QUARTER LIFE CRISIS - Time To Let Go

The term “Quarter life crisis” is a fairly millennial one. Not to discount anything the older generations had to endure but truth is every generation has had to bear the brunt of their times and in our case, I think our biggest nemesis are expectations.

Well, we live in an era where kids as young as seven code for fun, have thriving YouTube accounts with pretty sordid earnings and own actual companies! Literally every third person you meet is either an influencer or a TikTok star. If you don't believe me, Google it and you will be shocked at the number of successful child entrepreneurs. Trigger warning: Seeing kids a quarter of your age earn more than you have ever made in your lifetime may be a teeny bit disheartening!

I have to be honest and say I am totally guilty of being one of those people who sees YouTube videos and go "OMG..I can totally do that". Now if you ask me whether I will actually take the trouble to find a spot in my house with ample lighting, declutter it and then actually dress up to stand in front of a camera and then be able to actually deliver sensible, intelligent and aesthetic content and patiently wait for my view count to rise... the answer would be " Nope".

I realize I am forever going to be that person who is perfectly happy to self-contemplate on my couch, all the while encouraging these kid content creators and ensuring, with my dedicated scrolling, they get all the views they need to become the billionaires they are destined to be.

 

The biggest problem our generation faces are the never-ending expectations from us. Making your mark in the social media scenario with vlogs and tutorials and countless other ways to keep the bored humans of this planet occupied while trying to make money is just the tip of the iceberg. Even the intellectuals who consider themselves to be free from social media pressures, are having battles of their own. 

Because it just isn’t enough to get good grades in school anymore, you are expected to clear University entrance examinations because nothing you have done in grade school for 12 years matter unless you get into the best university in the country. It isn’t enough to just get into a good course at Uni, you are expected to pass with honors. It isn’t enough to finish your degree, you are expected to find a first job when ironically, 95 percent of the jobs in the market require 3 years of experience. It isn’t enough to get a job, you are expected to have one with benefits and a good enough salary package. It isn’t enough to just rent out a house you like, you are expected to own one. In all seriousness, the expectations never seem to end. Don’t even get me started on ideal partner, marriage and kids!

And when I say expected to, I mean not only by society but also subconsciously ourselves. We are the new age people who supposedly live life by our rules. We ignore anyone’s advice that don’t go with our personal ideals and advocate 'Haters gonna hate’ as our motto. But invariably, we gravitate towards what we define as success and end pulling ourselves down the rabbit hole with the exact same expectations which we wanted to get away from in the first place.

This is also the time when we encounter another enemy, The Debt. I believe adulting hits you truly when you embrace mortgage as a part of your life.

 

Now I am not saying everyone in the world is pining away to become high yearning cooperate employees or to have a billion-view count for their online channels. However, everyone is drawn to their personal definition of success and us being social animals, invariably start quantifying it by comparable variables, say the bank balance, the size of house or credit rating.

We have these expected ideals and timelines and goals and when we find ourselves deterred from our timelines, we go down a spiral. I honestly have lived long enough to realize nothing ever goes to plan, literally nothing. Again, that may not be the worst thing for you. ‘Everything happens for the best’ is a beautiful phrase but the essence of it comes from the fact that no matter what path life puts us on, there is always a way to find happiness. We end up defining happiness by those conventional views but end of the day, what makes me happy is NOT what makes you happy.

 

Essentially, quarter life crisis strikes when you are at that crossroads where you are forced to pause and re-evaluate your life and goals and rewrite all the plans you had in your head for future.

 

We have one life, with many phases and many people who enter and exit at various stages. Ultimately, it’s a journey you need to see through till the end and a little bit of self-love and self-acceptance can go a long way in making it a happy and pleasant one. Because one day we will truly be able to embrace the fact that being happy is the actual meaning of success.

Till next time.